Dr Suzy Green & Associates

Welcome back again!  Here’s hoping you shared the love on Valentine’s Day and even if you don’t have a lover at the moment, there’s no reason why you can’t express extra love on this day and every other day to your friends and family and to yourself too!  Don’t also underestimate the power of a hug.  The famous family therapist, Virginia Satir, claimed we need 4 hugs a day for survival, 8 hugs a day for maintenance and 12 hugs a day for growth.  You might also like to check out the famous YouTube clip “Free Hugs” (http://www.freehugscampaign.org) which extends the expression of love to strangers on the street!

Love and lovingkindness are particularly relevant this month in Australia with the bush fire tragedies.  Hearts have been touched and opened across the nation and globally.  There are many individuals wanting to find ways to help in addition to providing financial assistance - although donating money is often the best way initially so that emergency services and welfare organisations can quickly direct help to where it's needed most.  Perhaps also look for local community groups who have been proactive in this regard.  This can also be a great way to form stronger bonds within your community – see www.ourcommunity.com.au.  

For those wanting to know more about the psychological aspects associated with the bush fires, go to the Australian Psychological Society webpage, who have many resources on their website - http://www.psychology.org.au/bushfires.

SPECIAL REMINDER:
Happiness & Its Causes Conference – May 14-15, 2009, Darling Harbour, Sydney
www.happinessanditscauses.com.au
Now in its fourth year, Happiness & Its Causes is a highly acclaimed and extraordinary conference bringing together 50+ inspiring speakers and an engaged audience of over 2,000 delegates for a thrilling exploration of the science, psychology and philosophy of human happiness.   There will be some of Positive Psychology’s top scientists presenting including  Professor Sonja Lyubomirsky.

I’ll also be presenting on a panel at the conference discussing the topic of “Teaching our Children Well”.  Please note the Early Bird Offer (save $100 if you register by 13th March 2009).  Hope to see you there.

Month 2 - 2009 – The Real Deal:  Understanding and Developing Authenticity

Authenticity has a long history in philosophy, psychiatry and psychology.  To know yourself and act accordingly has been seen as a moral imperative throughout history (Harter, 2002). The past focus of research in psychology however has been on its opposite ie inauthenticity or “false-self behaviour”.  Such behaviour is highly correlated with psychopathology.  There’s also research that shows that one can tell a genuine smile (a Duchenne smile) from a fake smile (a PanAm smile) – you need crows feet around the eyes!

Authenticity involves owning one’s personal experiences, be they thoughts, emotions, needs, wants, preferences or beliefs and acting in accordance with the true self (eudaimonia).

Authenticity is also a new area of research in Positive Psychology and is included in the VIA - Character Strengths Inventory – www.authentichappiness.org) - identified as Honesty, Integrity & Authenticity.  Take the test if you haven’t done so already and see if Authenticity rates as a signature strength for you. 

This Month’s Action Plan – “To Thine Own Self Be True”

Take some time out this month to raise your self-awareness. 

Firstly, spend some time in self-reflection.  How would you describe yourself ie what are your values, your strengths, your inner qualities?  How would you describe your personality?  Describe yourself as you THINK you are now – write this out as a paragraph or fill a circle with adjectives that describe you.

Secondly, BEWARE THE BLIND SPOTS!  Reflect on any feedback you may have received from significant people in your life ie your boss, your peers, your partner, your friends.  Are you willing to ask for feedback on your blindspots?  What would need to happen for you to be open to this feedback?  Also reflect on your “hidden self” ie the aspects of yourself you keep hidden from others eg your impatience in queues!

Finally, then spend some time thinking about the person you’d like to be ie your Best Possible Self – refer to March 07 e-news for this activity located on my website.

Then set some goals around behaviours or character traits you might like to work on developing or changing.  Ask yourself the following questions:

• What do you need to do to move towards your ideal self?
• What qualities do you want to develop?
• What strengths will you draw on?
• How would you ideally be thinking, feeling and behaving?
• How would others know you were developing a greater sense of authenticity?
• What would need to happen for you to start to portray a greater sense of authenticity to the world?

Don’t forget to highlight the aspects of yourself you're content with currently eg your strengths.  It’s also important to not be too hard on yourself.  Positive change needs to start with increasing self-acceptance ie as I am warts & all. 

Next Month…More on authenticity ……..

"My father taught me that reputation, not money,
was the most important thing in the world.”

William Rosenberg, Dunkin Donuts Founder